How do i code this for vbulletin?

i need to code http://pixelgrounds.com/skin/catagory/catagory.html
for my community which will hopefully launch 01/01/2005.

for the moment that is just a sliced image convertied into html, if you are using firefox the bit where the threads would go isnt stretched, if you look in explorer they are.

anyway, how do i code my vb so my categorys look like this?

*I have no cash to pay no one, anyway, be full of the xmas spirit and help me!*