Don't say this to a cop

The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he/she pulls you over.

20. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

19. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

18. Aren't you the guy from the villiage people?

17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.

16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

14. Bad cop. No donut.

13. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?

12. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.

11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops?

10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

9. I pay your salary

8. So uh, you on the take or what?

7. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.

6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.

4. What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.

3. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.

2. Hey, is that a 9mm? That's nothing compared to this 44 magnum.

1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?

!

Never said anything like those..

However, on several occasions, police have got pissed at me for answering their questions with "kinda's" and "maybe's" and other questions. :x

Hahaha lolll #2

Just today on my way to the gym I was walking when the "walk" sign thingy was still green. So i kept walking and had about 4-6 more steps to go until i reached the crosswalk when it started flashing red. I kept on walking and the first car stopped under the red light was a cop in disguise. He asked me if i was tryin to kill myself lol...I was like "no sir not today" and he gave me a ticket. F*ker!

Originally Posted by Dray Hahaha lolll #2 Just today on my way to the gym I was walking when the "walk" sign thingy was still green. So i kept walking and had about 4-6 more steps to go until i reached the crosswalk when it started flashing red. I kept on walking and the first car stopped under the red light was a cop in disguise. He asked me if i was tryin to kill myself lol...I was like "no sir not today" and he gave me a ticket. F*ker!

Wow, I jaywalk all the time and I've never gotten a ticket.

American cops are crazy...I heard a story about an Australian tourist in Texas somewhere who jaywalked. A policeman gave him a warning. After coming out of the shop he was going into 5min later, without thinking about it he jaywalked again. The cop pulled his gun on the guy and I think arrested him.
In. Sane.

Only in America .

This one's my favorite:

5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.

Haha number 5 is the best!

I pay your salary....thats the best